Who Do I Think I Am?

Whoa, I need to work on this.  This could take a while.

Well, let’s see…

I was a C-Section baby (thank God, because I don’t know that I could deal with imaging the other possibility) of a single, white female in St. Joseph, Missouri.  I was born in the middle of a blizzard!  Yeah, hell was probably freezing over.  When I was maybe a year old my mom married a complete asshat that I like to blame all of my problems on.  I’m not going to get into that any further.

In Kindergarten my favorite activity was hanging upside down on the monkey bars with no underwear on.  Hey, I was wearing tights!!  My mom says I was a regular offender and she was always getting calls from the school.  ”Could you please bring your daughter some panties?” or “She was on the monkey bars again with her dress over her head.”  When I was in the 3rd grade, I got in trouble for taking porn to school for “Show and Tell”.  I didn’t get suspended, just a stern talking to.  A precursor to all the fornicating to come.

*****More to come soon!!*****