Before You Do It… Consider
This is a reminder to all of us who can hurt someone with our words or our actions. Being rude or judgmental, making off-hand comments, cracking jokes at the wrong things or by just making fun of someone. Sometimes, the pain we cause can be so detrimental that a person could take their own life. In the very least, what we say can ruin someone’s life and traumatize them forever. Before you do it, consider that:
-Mother’s Day is a great day, unless you are a mother who has lost a child or you are a child who has lost their mother. While you enjoy your day, think of those who have lost the light of their life. Stop and spare a thought for the women out there who will never have the joy of birthing a child, yet they long to cuddle a beautiful baby in their arms. Relish the fact that you have a mom or a child and enjoy every moment of it because life is never long enough to love them as much as you want. Pray for the children who have a mother that deserted them or who doesn’t care about them. Go out of your way to show them that you care.
-Before you say, “Oh, that’s gay.” Stop and think. Maybe the person you are saying it to, is in fact, gay. Because of people like yourself, they are afraid of who they are. I must admit, I was a huge culprit of doing this (even though I didn’t maliciously mean it). That of course, was until the day that one of my best friends came out to me. Not only did I feel like an ass at the time but every day of my life, I question just how much I hurt that person. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of it.
-Before you criticize someone for their “lack of disciplining” their child, stop and think that perhaps their lack of discipline is not because they don’t care but maybe because they care too much. Sometimes people who have been abused or neglected are less likely to punish their own child. The pain that you experience at the hands of an abuser changes your life forever. Every moment of every day, you think of that when it comes to raising your own children. The worst feeling ever is imagining that you are hurting your own child as much as you were hurt. Be patient and understanding. Not everyone is fortunate enough to grow up in the perfect house.
-Be humble with what you have. Admit it, you only want to broadcast it to everyone because you think it’s so awesome. If you had chlamydia, I bet you wouldn’t be sharing it with the world. Think of all of the things that you have and appreciate them. When you’re done with that, think of all of the things that someone else doesn’t have, appreciate that person and see what you can do to change it. Some of the greatest blessings in our own life are best shared with someone else.
-Before you buy or adopt a pet, consider everything in your life. Think about who you are, who your family is, where you live and where you want to go in life. Plan ahead for the possibility of residential moves (big and small), household changes, your health, your ability to have a child, the other pets you have and the status of your relationship. Safely, all you really have to do is ask yourself one question. If one thing loved me unconditionally for the rest of my life, could I cast it aside because something in my life changed? If your answer is yes, they sell Chia Pets at CVS or Walgreen’s. If you answer “no”, consider just how amazing your life would be with a best friend who can never make you listen to their life stories.
-If you love something, set it free. Don’t let it go, hold it in your heart. If you do this the right way, sometimes the heart-strings can pull it back to you. Love completely and love freely. Free of expectations, free of doubts and free of worry. It will reward you one hundred fold. (at least I think so, I haven’t got this down quite yet)
-Hand out heart-felt apologies like Planned Parenthood hands out condoms. Offer them to everyone, regardless to who they are or who you think they are. Sometimes we mess up. Don’t be afraid to admit it. Confucius says “Man caught holding breath for apology will turn blue and die.” Okay, Confucius didn’t say that but take my word for it.
-Laugh often. Laugh until you make doodie in your pants or at the very least, a warm yellow stain. Laughter is the very best medicine. If you see someone who’s heart is breaking, fall out of a chair and break your arm. It may hurt for a second but the gratification of making someone else’s life better will be so worth it. So the smile on their face will last 2 seconds and the pain of your broken arm will last weeks, get over it. For 2 whole seconds, you made someone’s life a little better.
-Throw rocks in your glass house and see how great that works. When your world falls apart around you, maybe you will be able to see through the glass shards in your eyes enough to know that no one’s life is perfect. Unless perfection means imperfection. Throw your judgments away, don’t cast them another day. We are all too busy judging people to ever really know what’s happening.